A little late, but better late than never....so I went to the Lily Allen concert a couple weeks ago and it was hilarious! Truth be told, she is kind of my idol (minus the language and the smoking...) Seriously, she smoked throughout the concert, is that normal? Just kidding, not my idol but I love British accents and she is a celebrity, she's got it all.... So I took my friend Christin for her birthday and I'm not going to lie. Probably the funnest gift I have given (right Christin?) The night started off freezing our butts off waiting with the strangest people of SLC. I especially enjoyed the hippy women behind us (lesbians I assume) who I couldn't help but overhear her ranting about pigs (pre-flu). It went a little something like this...."And then they line up the lady pigs and shoot man pig up them and throw them back in their poo infested cages..." Mmm....pork. The other white meat....
It was general admission so we hurried to the front and wound up super close to the stage. It didn't last long though. That's what I don't understand about GA, why do people that got there much later than me think it's ok to plow their way to the front when they obviously got there later than us? It got awkward, real fast.
This mother/daughter combo was just too much for me to handle. Do they look familiar? You probably either saw them on Jerry Springer or possibly Maury (I assume paternity tests revealed) at some point. Seriously. Apparently, the daughter (the one with the Mohawk) wanted to get closer to the stage. So, her mother gets behind her and the two of them acted like a cannonball plowing through the audience. Naturally, people got ticked and at that point the mother grabbed a younger girl and held her by the collar and held her fist up to her face. Like I said, it got really awkward. Lily Allen saw the whole thing happen from the stage and told them to "(expletive) knock it off. This is my (expletive) show and if you don't knock it off I am going to come down there at (expletive) your (expletive). Yeah. I wanted to make sure you could get a visual so I had Christin take a picture of me to see how bad the flash was. I made her take the picture, and luckily we were not caught. I was worried that if Christin was caught, they might kill her, but it was a chance I was willing to take...
Another highlight of the concert is when Lily dedicated a song to all the women and gay's in the audience. She only confirmed my suspicions....about 80% of the men in SLC are gay. You heard it here first. So, if any of you are wondering why I am not dating anyone...there you have it....so please stop asking.
The concert was a BLAST, however, as sad as it is I fear I might be getting too old for GA. I mean, I sweated my brains out, my feet got stomped to the ground a million times and I kept getting hit in the head with random things. Also, not to be rude, but teenagers, you are super annoying. I distinctly remember telling Christin that if this girl put her hands in my face again
Christin, thanks for having a birthday....and Lily....thanks for the excellent concert!
8 comments:
Katie...to hilarious for words. I swear you always have the darndest experiences and see the strangest people. What a deal. Thanks for once again pure entertainment! You should write a column for the paper or something!
Why do I not remember the swine converstation. I remember the women, but not the pigs... I thought I would remember something like that...but I could have easily been distracted by any one of the million wierdos around us.
Funny! I have met some of the weirdest people at concerts but I think that's why I enjoy them so much. Where else do you get smashed up against people like that?
You never disappoint in entertaining! If you feel like you're getting old I must be ancient. We were at Subway eating our $5 footlong and I wanted to ask them to turn down the loud music...
I was done with GA after college. I don't have the patient for it either. On the other hand, it's annoying to go to concert and you want to stand up and dance and everyone else is like "sit down" What? is it my dancing or my big butt you find so offensive?
Second only to the mohawk daughter, you are HOT, Kate! I'm loving the new hair and bangs...keep that going.
I feel the same way every time we go to a concert. Michael has this ability to block out everything going on around him and focus on "the music." Meanwhile I end up pissed at the human race. Teenagers are the worst, but they are trumped only by half naked drunk girls in their 20's that think they might get with the band after the show.
Let's compare your Lily Allen GA with our Morissey GA next time I'm in town. Dad is still talking about the opening band, King Cheetah. And of course M attracts just as weird of weirdos as Lily. It will be good times I assure.
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